Meet Hades
by Milkamoo97
Summary: I don't want to talk about the twisted crap I used to pull on people back in the day-I'm different now- I've got a hot wife, a great son plus I actually have friends now. It's been great. And I'm not going to let anyone get in my way...


**Meet Hades**

**One Shot**

**Heey mi amigos, sorry about the lack of updates but here is the next story in the 'Meet The Gods' series as promised. If you haven't read **_**Meet Apollo**_** don't worry, nothing from there is carried on here although you can read it if you want to :') **

**Also if you haven't yet please check out my one shot Grounded :') **

**IMPORTANT PLEASE READ :D**

**This one shot does not have a particular order so after each little line thingy (~~~Cheeky Break Line~~~) it is a completely different story to do with Hades. Hope you like it and please review! **

**Disclaimer: I do not own anything! This is purely for amusement! Hope you like mi amigos :')**

Look, I know what I did to Persephone was wrong. There I have admitted it, I won't do it again. I was a bad God…blah, blah, blah. But seriously Demeter needs to get over it. Persephone loves being with me- even if she isn't crazy happy with my son just yet. I love Persephone and how she is even related to Demeter I do not know. I just wish that Demeter would stop bugging me about cereal.

**~~~cheeky break line~~~**

"NICO! HADES!" I heard Persephone yell.

I ran to her and replied "Yes darling?"

"Don't you _dare_ 'darling' me- who trampled my flowers? You or that imbecilic child of yours?" she asked dangerously

"Hey! I'm not imbecilic!" Nico objected whilst strolling towards us "And what is all the yelling about?"

"I bet it was you!" she sneered at him "Do you know how _rare_ these flowers are? It will take another 100 years before they bloom again"

"Well you are immortal so it doesn't matter that much.." Nico chuckled.

Persephone slapped him and shouted "Oh so you think this is funny?! How about I turn _you_ into a flower and then step on you! Lets' see how you feel then!"

"Dear…I really don't think that is necessary" I tried to reason with her, for my sons sake, but I was ignored.

Before I knew it Persephone had clicked her fingers and Nico was transformed into a daffodil.

"SERIOUSLY?" he yelled

Ok…so a talking daffodil….

"Yes, and now lets' see how you feel when I trample you" she laughed mechanically and made her way forward but I stepped in front of her to stop her.

"No." I said bluntly.

"No?" she shouted "What do you mean no?!"

"I'm not going to let you squash and possibly kill or maim my only son who is going to be my heir. So turn him back _now_" I demanded.

"No" she growled

"_Persephone"_ I warned.

"Ugh..fine! But I am not happy!" she reminded me

"Believe me, I know" I sighed

The next morning I ordered my skeleton guards to make sure that both Persephone and Nico join me at the table for breakfast. My ingenious plan is either going to work perfectly or blow up in my face. Honestly I'm betting on the latter but even the Lord Of The Dead needs some hope sometimes. And if I want to keep my sanity then I need to get Persephone and Nico to stop arguing.

"Morning love" Persephone greeted and sat down "So what are we discussing?"

"Wait a second" I smiled and right on cue Nico walked in.

"What is _that_ doing in here with us?" Persephone inquired.

"Jeez, morning to you too grouchy" Nico smiled and sat down on the other side of me, opposite from Persephone.

"Look, kid, your father and I need to speak alone so go and play with your magic cards" she smirked.

"Oh I'm sorry, I didn't ask a skeleton to escort me here. And secondly they are called Mythomagic cards, get it right" he replied.

"I don't care about your little children's game" she sneered

"Children's game?! Mythomagic is not a game for children! How dare you even suggest that!" he shouted

"Silence!" I demanded and they both finally listened to me.

"Good" I praised "I called you both here because I am fed up with your arguing. You are my family and you need to get used to each other. As of now I have decided that you are both grounded in the underworld and are not allowed to leave until you have bonded with each other or if I give you permission…understood?"

"NO!" Persephone and Nico yelled at the same time.

"Oh look, you've already agreed on something…this shouldn't take long at all"

**~~~cheeky break line~~~~**

After a boring meeting, no surprise there, on Olympus I decided to go on a stroll to sooth my mind. I ended up in one of the gardens, undoubtedly one of Demeter's, overlooking the city. Although Demeter may be a serious pain in my backside the things that she creates are simply beautiful.

"Hello brother" Zeus greeted standing next to me.

"Zeus" I nodded.

Things turned slightly awkward due to the silence between us as we both stared onwards.

"I trust things are well in the Underworld" Zeus said trying to make small talk.

"Yes" I replied "Is there any reason for you to suspect otherwise?"

"Brother, I did not come here to fight with you - rather the opposite really" Zeus told me with his hands up in a surrender fashion. If only I had a camera because this will probably never happen again.

"Just cut to the chase Zeus, we both know that small talk is not your forte" I yawned.

"Well I have come to the decision that you should be able to attend meetings more often. You are one third of the Big Three and it is crucial that we work together from now on" he told me.

I understood what he meant. Having the rulers of the world constantly bickering represents a broken and corrupted government. A strong government is not infiltrated as easily or to put it simply, not overruled as easily. Zeus must have finally got over his paranoia of Poseidon and I supposedly always wanting to overthrow him.

"I was hoping that we could let bygones be bygones" he proposed nervously.

I laughed sarcastically "After all that you have done to me?! You think that I am just going to overlook everything that you have done and put me through and go through with whatever it is that you want? I don't think so Zeus. But for the sake of this family I will make an effort so they don't have to witness us arguing every few minutes but I will _never_ forgive you Zeus" I growled referring to when he killed Maria.

"And you've never done anything to spite me? You murdered my daughter- an innocent little girl!" Zeus shouted obviously forgetting his 'no fighting' plea.

"She was the result of a _broken _oath brother! Do you also not remember your wrongdoings? You killed an innocent woman and tried to murder two innocent children who were born before we made the pact!" I reminded him.

"This is ridiculous" he muttered "Ok, I admit I've done some reckless, ruthless and foolish things in the past- as have you. But Hades, we need to move on from this and work together. We need to be a strong and united family because the Titans nearly beat us…"

"They would have if it wasn't for Poseidon's brat" I sighed rubbing my temples.

"Exactly- so are we good?" Zeus asked holding out his hand.

"I suppose we're good" I answered shaking his hand

**~~~Cheeky Break Line~~~**

"Lord Hades, what is this about?" I heard a bored voice sigh as they entered my throne room.

I opened my eyes to see my nephew godling Perseus 'Percy' Jackson, saviour of Olympus. Or as I like to call him my way to get back at Poseidon.

"Please Percy, there is no need for formalities" I told him stepping towards him "You can call me Uncle"

He took a step away from me and said "Ok now I am officially creeped out - tell me what is going on or I am leaving"

"Why the rush?" I chuckled "Am I not allowed to have a conversation with my own nephew?"

"No."

"Harsh" I muttered

"Can I go now?" he moaned.

"Err about that…not really. In fact it would help if you didn't leave for, hmm I don't know..a couple of weeks?" I said.

"WHAT?!" he shouted at me.

Maybe I should have followed Nico's advice and sugar coat it a bit instead of blurting it out. Rule Number One for the future- listen to son when planning revenge schemes.

"Let me explain" I told him.

"Yes. Explain. Now" he demanded which I let slip for now- I can't exactly spontaneously combust him because I need him.

"I want to get a bit of revenge on your father. He got Aphrodite to…_redecorate _my throne on Olympus! Now it is pink and smells like that disgusting perfume that she wears! I mean why would he do that? He is meant to be my brother but now I have to put with a pink throne which is covered in flowers and icky valentines day things until I find enough time to get it back to normal. Stupid fish face…"

"Erm Lord Hades?" Percy asked whilst I was muttering to myself about how many times I wanted to kill Poseidon with his own trident.

"Yes so anyway I got thinking. What or _whom_ is Poseidon's favourite thing? And of course that is you. So you can 'hang out' here for a while, you can do whatever you want and you'll be able to get away from everyone and everything for a while. It's a win-win situation Percy. You get a deserved break and I get my revenge on Poseidon!" I explained.

He considered it for a second and I was hoping that he would say yes. Of course I could kidnap him and keep him down here but it would just be easier if he was willing and I know that Nico would let him out anyway and then lecture me about how kidnapping people was wrong and haven't I learnt from Persephone…blah blah blah. And Poseidon would go crazy if he found out that his son was 'missing'. And he'd go absolutely mental if he found out he was with me. And finding out that Percy was here willingly would just be the icing on top of cake.

"I don't think that this is such a good idea Lord Hades" he told me.

I coughed and he grudgingly corrected himself "Uncle"

"And why ever not?" I inquired.

"Because as soon as I go back Dad is going to coddle me and it's horrible! I'll have to spend ages at his palace again whilst he hugs me and refuses to let me out of his sight" Percy shivered.

"_Again?_ So this has happened before?" I laughed.

"Don't laugh at me!" Percy whined "You don't know how embarrassing it is! And not to mention annoying. Although I guess it is just his way of showing that he cares"

"So you'll do it?" I asked hopefully.

"Fine" he agreed

"Yes!" I cheered.

"But you owe me!" he warned.

In the end I convinced Percy to stay in the Underworld for two and a half weeks, despite his constant preaching about only staying for one week to not torture his father too much. It wasn't as hard as I thought it would be though- Nico stayed with him so he wasn't too lonely and they managed to catch up but he did sleep for most of his duration. Nico told me that he got barely any sleep after the war because of never-ending night tremors, reliving the war in his sleep and idiotic gods sending him on more and more silly quests rendering the poor boy exhausted. Poseidon got so angry that he kept sending me threats of what he would do to me if I didn't return Percy. I found it quite amusing but I also got my own back. I sent him threats saying if he didn't return my throne back to it's proper state I would hurt Percy…lets' just say my throne has never looked better! But enough was enough for the boy who stated that he had too much to get done and the longer he stayed here the longer he would have to stay with his father at the underwater palace.

"Thank you for humouring me Percy" I thanked him.

"You're welcome Uncle- it was nice just to relax for once" he laughed.

"Just so you know- you're welcome down here anytime you want. Even if it is just an extreme need to take a nap" I offered

"Thanks Uncle- I shall be taking you up on that offer" he smiled gratefully and then he held onto Nico who shadow traveled him out.

I couldn't help but laugh to myself when thinking of what he would have to endure for the next couple of weeks with his father. Yikes.

**~~~Cheeky Break Line~~~**

"I'm bored" Nico announced for the hundredth time during my meeting with Thanatos.

Originally my plan was to get Nico used to the way things worked in the Underworld. As my heir he needs to understand all of this so I can get a break sometimes. It doesn't help that Thanatos is moaning about something that I don't particularly care about. Plus Charon keeps sticking his head in every ten minutes asking when it would be suitable to discuss his pay rise. I answered with never but he has chosen to ignore that comment. Damn that man and his fetish for expensive Italian suits. Who does he think he is? Zeus?! So to sum everything up this meeting has been a nightmare.

"Look, son, you need to learn the business side of the Underworld as well as just being titled as 'heir'. Everybody who works for me will also be looking up to you for decision making- especially in times where I may not be here" I explained to him.

"Why would you not be here though?" he asked.

"In case I'm attending a meeting on Olympus or if I need a break every once in a while" I replied "I've been doing this job for years and a break is seriously overdue. Not to mention the fact the Persephone is still going on at me about taking her on holiday"

Nico nodded but still didn't let the subject drop "But I'm sure some business can be put off if you're not here…"

"I'm sure it could" I agreed "But I don't want it to. You are staying right here and learning what I want you to. Plus if I have to sit through this insufferable meeting then so do you, understood?"

"Yes Father" he sighed resting his chin on his hand waiting for Thanatos to continue.

"Well if I'm boring you that much I might as well leave" Thanatos huffed wanting me to apologise for offending him.

"Oh- bye then" I replied and dismissed him with a wave of my hand.

He gasped and stormed off, I thought he would have been used to me by now.

"Don't you think that was a little harsh?" Nico asked."

"No" I stated "However I could always call him back and then we can listen to him whine for another two hours…"

"Oh Gods no!" Nico laughed and I laughed along with him.

Charon then once again poked his head in and once seeing the throne room was empty besides Nico and I, he stepped forward.

"Lord Hades, now seems like an appropriate time ti discuss my pay rise. You see, I've found two Italian suits that I've fallen in love with but with all of my other costs- well lets just say my budget doesn't extend that far…"

"NO CHARON!" I exploded "Ask for more money one more time for another Italian suit and I will set fire to the ones you already have and throw them in the Styx! I will also decrease your current pay amount and increase your work!"

"Oh no! I'm sorry Lord Hades, won't happen again Lord Hades!" he apologised and left.

"Now _that_ may have been a bit too harsh" Nico told me.

I felt slightly bad for a moment but then quickly recovered

"Rule number one, my boy, never feel 'bad' it doesn't go with your 'bad boy' attitude" I joked

"Oh shut up"

**So that's it for now mi amigos hehe :') How did you find it? Like it, love it, hate it? Please put it into a review so I can see what you thought! **

**Also I hope that everyone had a great Christmas and a very happy new year! Love to you all and may a fantastic year lie ahead of us :') **

**Please check out some other stories of mine such as **_**Grounded**_** my other one shot and my multi chapter story **_**Like Fools And Horses**_** :') My multi-chapter story will be updated soon! Sorry for the long wait on that- I've had horrible writer's block hahaa :')**

**Until the next time mi amigos :') **


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